My son's father

 

Lily had only barely had time to come home with the baby when the Eriksens invaded their apartment. While her son – their sweet little baby who had yet to be named – slept on, big people crowded around him.

Marshall was beaming at his wife and son. Really, his son was the best thing since sliced bread and his wife was just beautiful. What was there not to smile about?

Then the front door opened, but instead of another large Eriksen entering, Barney came in. “Oh yeah, the person you’ve all been waiting for is here.”

He fired off a charming smile at the lot of Eriksens in the living room – and they all half-glared back at him, telling him in no uncertain terms that Barney certainly wasn’t the person they had been waiting for.

Lily gazed down at her son. If only they knew how important Barney was to the story.

They’d been sharing a bed for a while – her, Marshall and Barney. Barney joined in occasionally, spicing up their sex life and making things fun. Lily couldn’t possibly feel more loved than when she had both boys paying her all the attention – but she didn’t mind when they turned their attention onto each other, either. God, she could get hot just thinking about it.

Marshall knew of Lily’s fear of carrying a huge Eriksen baby. He’d seen her reaction to his mother’s description of the turkey-sized baby – and really, he could understand it. She was tiny, especially compared to him.

Barney, on the other hand, was lithe and not nearly as tall. Besides, he was pretty as all hell and smart, and other than his view on women – whichh Lily certainly wouldn’t allow any child of hers to share – he was a very good man. He had to have good genes.

All that meant that when they started talking seriously about having a child, they both had the idea in the back of their minds, although they didn’t quite voice it. Neither one had any idea of how to present – and sell – it to Barney.

Marshall solved it. “So, what would you say about having a kid?”

The question was in the same tone that he usually asked if Barney wanted pancakes, with just a hint of squeak to it.

Barney, in turn, spit coffee all over the table. “What?”

“I – we – want to have a baby,” Lily said, coming to stand beside Marshall.

“And Lily here—well, she’s not made for an Eriksen baby,” Marshall said.

“So we thought that we’d, uh, well – we thought we’d ask you.” Lily spoke quickly, as though Barney would say yes to it even if he hadn’t quite heard what she suggested.

Barney stood up, eyes wide. “Are you—are you both insane? Mentally deranged? A baby? Me? You’ve got to be kidding – I haven’t spent thousands of dollars on protection and stuff in the last decade just to consciously knock someone up at the end of it!”

He fumed silently after that, while Marshall and Lily changed the subject and talked about other things, pretending that they hadn’t just asked Barney a possibly life altering question.

They continued to enjoy sex together. Lily and Marshall spent, in an unspoken agreement, more time on Barney, making him feel truly included and loved and safe with them. What had been just sex turned into something more as the months passed. They didn’t talk about a baby again.

That was, until one night when they had all been at the bar and came back to the apartment. They weren’t drunk, but they certainly weren’t sober either.

When Marshall reached for the condom, Barney made a face, something like a groan escaping him before he said, “Don’t.”

Lily’s and Marshall’s eyebrows rose in identical expressions of surprise.

Barney looked down. “I’ll do it. The kid thing. If you still want.” He paused, but continued before the other two had any time to gather their wits to say anything. “But it’ll be yours. All the dirty diapers and the screaming and the getting up in the middle of the night. I—I like kids, but I’m not daddy material. I’ll just be the funny uncle who teaches him about girls.”

Lily couldn’t find words, so she pulled him into a kiss.

And now they were here. Barney had topped – for once – and that was all it had taken. Obviously, they were both fertile. Barney’s only comment upon Lily giving him the news was, “Thank God I always used protection before. I knew my swimmers were good.”

And after swelling to the size of a beach ball, their little baby boy was finally here. He had his father’s blond hair and large blue eyes, currently closed. His tiny fingers were curled tightly together, his mouth slightly open as he snored. He looked like his dad, Lily thought fondly.

“Son, this doesn’t look like an Eriksen baby.”

Lily saw the look of fear on Marshall’s face upon his father’s words.

“What?” Marshall asked. “Of course he does.”

“Not nearly as big as you were,” his mother complained.

“Lily’s small,” Marshall said. “Her whole family is small. Of course the baby can’t be as big as I was.”

Barney came over, looking at the baby in the cot. It wasn’t the first time he met the child – his child – and he didn’t show any particular emotion upon gazing at the boy. Lily hid a smile behind a glass of water; she had seen the emotions rolling across Barney’s face when he’d first met his son. It hadn’t been much, because Barney never showed emotions of vulnerability in a big way, but she’d known him long enough to know. She’d seen how his mouth fell open at the sight; she’d seen the awe in his eyes. Even after taunting Lily for months for being fat – and yes, he’d gotten a few slaps for it, with Lily blaming the hormones – he had obviously had trouble with the idea that he had done that. He’d gotten her pregnant; he’d created a child with her.

Somehow, it had never been problematic. Marshall had taken care of her every need, had loved her as much as he had loved her since the day they met. He saw the baby as theirs – all three of them. Marshall would be the father, Lily the mother – and Barney would be there, a close uncle and friend of the child.

“Well,” said Barney, bringing Lily back to the present. “With that Eriksen nose, he can’t be anything but Marshall’s kid, now can he?”

Lily snorted quietly. The baby certainly didn’t have an Eriksen nose – if such a thing existed – but a tiny Stinson nose. The child would grow up into a very handsome young man, she was sure of it. Then again, she supposed every mother thought their child to be beautiful.

“Yes, that is true,” Marshall’s mother said and Lily had to believe in the power of wanting to believe.

Then the baby woke up and soon, the room filled with crying. Lily moved to pick her son up – but Barney surprised her by reaching into the cot with only a little bit of hesitance and picking him up.

It didn’t look awkward. She’d seen Barney with his nephew and she knew he was good with children and babies. He whispered something to the baby – she thought she heard something about not puking on the suit – and held the baby boy. Lily hoped their son would inherit Barney’s gracefulness. And though he didn’t want to, with his son in his arms, Barney looked every bit a father in Lily’s eyes.

Marshall came up behind her and wrapped his arms around her. He spoke in her ear, “We picked good.”

“We picked really good.” Lily leaned into him.

Barney walked over to them, baby secure in his arms. “I think this is yours.”

Lily took the baby and smiled. Once she had her son in her arms, she leaned over and placed a kiss on Barney’s cheeks. “No,” she said. “This is ours.”

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