Chapter Three

Buffy stirred, stretching her legs and noticing that she was not in her bed. She opened her eyes and saw Spike there, still sleeping. Memories of the night before came crashing down on her. Spike sick. Her watching him. Dawn comforting her. Then Dawn went to bed and Buffy made herself comfortable by Spike on the floor next to the couch, to be able to watch over him.

She had obviously fallen asleep.

She got up, careful not to wake him. She watched his chest rise and fall with every breath he took. It was something she thought she would never see with him. He looked peaceful, and his face seemed to have recovered some color again. The dark shadows beneath his closed eyes were less apparent. In short, he looked much better than the night before. She put her small hand on his forehead and was glad to find that even though the fever did not seem to be altogether gone, it was lower than the day before.

Buffy heard Dawn come down. When she had descended the stairs, her sister stopped and said, "Mornin'."

"Good morning."

"He better?" Dawn asked and walked over to the couch.

"I think so. The fever seems to have gone down."

At her words, Spike stirred awake and he opened his eyes. The two Summers women stood beside him, and he smiled.

"Should be sick more often," he grinned.

Buffy knew she should have some witty comeback, but she was too happy to care. She threw her arms around him.

"Thank god you're okay," she said, holding him tightly. He smiled softly, stroking her hair, and holding her just as tightly.

"Are you?" he asked.

"Why wouldn't I…" she began, but the now-familiar sickness began sweeping over her, and she suddenly knew what he meant. "I'll be right back."

She darted off, leaving Dawn and Spike alone.

"Hey Nibblet," Spike said, sitting up.

"Hey. You, um, better now?"

He nodded. "Much."

"I heard you were like, uh, human," Dawn said casually, trying to ignore the noise Buffy was now making upstairs. If she did not ignore it, she feared she would have to go throw up herself.

"Um, yeah. Dunno how, it just kinda happened." He looked over at her.

"So, you've got a soul now and is all brooding like Angel?" Dawn asked. He did not seem as broody as Angel had always been, but on the other hand, Dawn had not seen all that much of Spike since he had become human.

"I don't know. I mean, I hope not. I don't wanna be all broody like Peaches. What bloody fun would that be?"

Dawn smiled at him, glad to hear that he hopefully would not turn all boring as Angel. "Good. You know, I'm hungry, I'm gonna go get breakfast. You, um, want anything? I'm guessing you don't drink blood anymore…? At least I hope not, cause that was gross."

"You know how to make hot chocolate with marshmallows, li'l bit?"

She nodded and disappeared out to the kitchen. Minutes later, Buffy came down the stairs.

"Feeling better?" Spike asked her, and she nodded.

"Where's Dawn?" Crashing from the kitchen and an, "It's okay!" answered her question. She sat down beside Spike. "You look better."

"I feel better." He looked at her. She looked so beautiful, so glowing. He bent down and placed a soft kiss on her lips.

"Spike, not now, Dawn's here…" she mumbled, but deepened the kiss anyway. It felt so good. She moved her hand up and began playing with his hair, and he had his arms around her, pulling her closer. She groaned with pleasure as his hands began caressing her breasts.

"Oh god…" she mumbled. He kissed her neck and collarbone, gently pushing her down with him onto the couch, so that she was underneath him.

"Oh my god what are you doing?" Dawn stood in the hallway, looking at the two. "Wouldn't that be like R-rated or something?"

Spike and Buffy both sat up, Spike with a mischievous grin on his face and Buffy blushing bright red. She was pulling down her shirt.

"Dawn, um…" Buffy began, but then fell silent because she had no idea of how to continue.

"Okay you two, it's all right. I know about birds and bees, you know. But please, on our couch – eww!" Dawn put her hands on her hips.

"Oh you just wait until you…" Spike began, but Buffy slapped his chest to get him quiet.

"Dawn, go to the kitchen. We'll be there in a second."

Dawn shrugged and left. Spike sat, still with his arm around her and still with that trademark cocky grin on his face. "You can't just get me started like that, you know…" he mumbled, leaning in to kiss her again. His lips met her for a second before Buffy broke it off.

"Not. Now." she said. "My little sister is already traumatized."

"Oh come on, you don't think she's done it already?"

Buffy glared at him. "Okay, eww! I really don't want to think about that. Besides, no, I don't think so. She – she's more responsible than that."

He kissed her again. "I still don't think she's traumatized."

Buffy threw him off and stood up. "Get up so we can eat breakfast," she told him, and left for the kitchen.

The doctor's office was filled with people when Buffy entered with Spike in tow, and she dreaded that she would have to wait for a long time before getting to see her doctor. An hour later, that dread had become truth. Buffy was sitting, flipping restlessly through a magazine, with Spike beside her. He had a slightly scared look on his face.

"What is it?" Buffy asked finally, having been unsuccessful in understanding what it was Spike was scared of.

"Nothing," Spike replied too quickly.

"Come on. Tell me."

He looked at her. "This," he said and put a gentle hand on her stomach. "That is what scares me. I'm sitting here, watching all these women with their bloody huge stomachs, and I know that you'll look the same, and I know that it is because you're carrying something that is mine, and I never thought that I'd have that. And it scares the hell outta me."

"I'm scared too," Buffy said quietly. "I never thought I'd have this either. I'm a Slayer, I'm not supposed to have kids, you know. And certainly not with a hundred-year-old vampire who recently turned human."

She put her own hand over Spike's on her stomach and held it.

"But I'm still glad, you know. I'm scared, but I'm also glad and amazed."

"I'll second all of the above," Spike grinned. "I love you, Slayer."

She looked up at him, his sincere eyes meeting hers and she knew that she should tell him, but she could not. Not yet.

"I know Spike. Please don't leave me."

"I'll never leave." He was disappointed about the fact that she had not returned her words of love, but he knew that bit by bit, he was breaking down that wall she had around herself. Just like he had ever since he first met her.

"Buffy Summers?" a nurse called out, getting the odd couple's attention.

"Here we go," Buffy muttered, and got up, following Spike to the doctor's office.

"And that, that is the baby," the doctor said pointing to a gray part on the screen.

"To me, it looks mostly like a big blob to me."

"Spike, be nice. It's our child you're talking about."

"What? Don't tell me you can make any sense out of that." He pointed at the screen.

The doctor followed the exchange, looking from one to another.

"If you let the doctor talk, maybe I could," Buffy bit back. Surprisingly, Spike fell silent and looked at the doctor, motioning to him to continue.

"Well, er, your child looks perfectly normal. It has come as long as should be expected. You are seven weeks pregnant, and I would like to see you again in a month or so."

"Okay," Buffy replied. "I'll see you in a month."

She pulled down her shirt and jumped off the table. She had to fill some papers out, but half an hour later, they were out of there.

"When are you gonna tell your mates?" Spike asked, opening the car door for her.

Buffy sat down and shrugged. "I don't know. I'm not sure how they'll take it. I'm thinking they're gonna flip."

"And your sis?" He started the car and drove out on the street, heading for the Summers' home.

"Well, if she's not completely stupid, she's probably suspecting something. You know, I have been throwing up like every single morning for six weeks."

"So why don't you tell her?"

"I will, okay!? I will!"

Another two weeks went by and Buffy began feeling better. She was not throwing up every single morning, and her breasts weren't hurting as bad as they had been. On the other hand, there was the belly thing. The thing that was called "it was growing". Nobody would notice it for another set of weeks, but she did. It was already harder than it had been before. The doctor had told her that since she was so small, her belly would probably grow big in proportion. She knew it would be showing fairly soon, and she knew she had to tell her friends before they found out by themselves.

It was just hard. Sometimes, she felt like denying the whole thing, telling herself that she was not going to be a mother at all. It was scaring her. Spike was there for her, every time she needed him, at the same time as he gave her space when she needed that. If what she had had for him before had been need, then she was definitely falling in love with him now. He was the best thing that had ever happened to her.

She stood in front of the mirror, pulling her shirt over her head, when there was a knock on the door, and Dawn entered. Buffy still had not told her little sister about her pregnancy.

"Hey," Dawn said as she sat down on the bed.

"Hey. What's up?"

"What are you doing?" Dawn asked instead of answering Buffy's question. Buffy was still standing in front of the mirror, checking herself out. She was pulling at the shirt and fingering at her stomach.

"Nothing," Buffy said, quickly turning around and dropping her hands to her sides.

"When are you going to tell me?" Dawn asked, looking up at her older sister.

"Tell you? About what?" Buffy asked. She hoped that Dawn was not talking about what she thought Dawn was talking about.

"Oh come on. Do you think I was born yesterday? You are pregnant. What's the big deal?"

Buffy looked at her little sister, slightly shocked. Her sister did not think that a baby was a big deal. That was just great.

As if Dawn could read her thoughts, Dawn sighed. "I don't mean it that way. Of course it's a big deal that you're having a baby, but what's the big deal about telling me? It's not like I'm gonna freak."

Buffy sat down beside her sister and began stroking her hair. It was a calming motion that she had done since Dawn was a baby. "I know you're not, Dawnie. It was just… I don't know. It's hard. I haven't told the others, not even Giles or Willow."

"Afraid they're gonna freak?"

Buffy nodded. They were much more likely to dislike it than her sister was.

"Because Spike's the father?"

"How much of this have you figured out, Dawn?"

"Only that much. I mean, look at you two… Wasn't likely to be Riley either, cause if that was the case, they you would have had this kid like a year ago. And you're not the one-night-stand kinda girl, you know."

"You know, those monks made you way too smart." Dawn grinned at her, and she smiled back.

"Can I feel?" Dawn asked.

"You can't really feel anything yet, I'm only like nine weeks pregnant. But if you want to…" She pulled her shirt up to reveal her tan belly and Dawn reached out to touch it. She smiled when she did.

"It is such a cool thought," she said, "That there is something living in there. Something so small, but still alive, something that is gonna turn out to be a little baby."

Buffy smiled at her sister's amazement. She felt quite a lot the same way. It was amazing to think that in there, in her own belly, laid a treasure as big as this one.

"I know," she said. "It's just awesome."

"Just do it."

"What are you, a friggin' Nike commercial?" Buffy shot at Dawn who was standing next to her. Spike stood behind her, arms around her waist so that his hands were resting on her belly. The belly that had swelled just a little bit underneath Buffy's big sweatshirt. A belly that was now showing her pregnancy.

"What are they gonna do, tell you that they don't want to be your friends just cause you're pregnant? I really don't think so," Dawn said, trying to make Buffy enter the Magic Shop.

"Right. I'm just gonna go in. Just in." She looked at Dawn. "No, I can't."

"Buffy, love, it's okay. You'll be fine. Just bloody get on with it."

"Buffy, I'm getting cold. We're going in." With that, Dawn opened the door and dragged the Slayer inside.

Anya was standing behind the counter as always, Willow and Tara were sitting by the books. Giles and Xander were nowhere to be seen.

"Hey guys," Dawn greeted the girls in the shop cheerily.

"Hey Dawn, hey Buffy, hey Spike."

The three new comers sat down by the table, Spike next to Buffy and Dawn by the two Wiccas. She was immediately engrossed in the spell-books that the witches were looking at. Buffy was too nervous to care about the fact that her sister should not be learning spells.

"Where is Xander?" she asked Anya.

"Oh, he's at work. He'll be here any second, said he'd swing by to pick me up. We're going home to have sex."

The doorbell rang just as Anya finished the sentence off and Xander came in. "An, hon, haven't we discussed the whole 'what's appropriate and what's not' thing several times?" he asked and bent over the counter to kiss his fiancée.

"Now we're only missing Giles," Buffy said to no one in particular.

"I'm here." Giles came out from one of the storage rooms.

"Oh goodie. Now I have to do this," Buffy muttered. Spike stood up and walked behind her. Buffy inhaled deeply.

"SpikeandIaretogetherandI'mpregnant."

"Huh?" Everyone in the room – with the exception of Dawn of course – looked like big question marks.

"Spike and I are together and I'm pregnant!" Buffy said again, only slightly slower. But, slow enough for the group to hear what she was saying.

"Congratulations!" Anya smiled to the two.

Buffy was shaking and Spike laid his arms around her to calm her. She leaned back on him, holding his hand in a tight grip.

"How… When…" was heard from the otherwise quiet room.

"I'm thirteen weeks pregnant. We've been to the doctor and everything is fine, as far as the doctor can tell."

"But… Thirteen weeks? Wasn't that about the time when Spike just turned human?" Willow asked.

"That's how I realized what had happened to him," Buffy said quietly. "I began throwing up in the morning and realized I must be pregnant."

"Okay, this is just wrong!" Xander exclaimed.

"What?" Buffy asked, her eyes filling with tears. She had known Xander would probably be the hardest one to convince here.

"Look, I know that he –" he pointed at Spike "– is human and everything now, but he's still… He was a vampire for a hundred years, he killed hundreds if not thousands of people! This, this is just wrong! You can't be pregnant, not with him."

"Xander, I am pregnant with him," Buffy continued quietly, her eyes on the floor. "I didn't choose this, but this is what happened and to be honest…" She met Xander's eyes, "I'm happy."

"But, it can't be. He's a demon. Well maybe not anymore, but he's still…"

"Still what, Xander?" It was Anya who broke into the exchange. "Is he still evil? Wouldn't that mean that I would still be evil? I mean, I was a demon ten times longer as he was, and he has been turned back to what he was before, just like I have. We're exactly the same."

"You're not the same at all!" Xander protested weakly, although he knew that Anya had already won the argument.

"Well if you don't think so, then you're just stupid!" Anya said. She took her engagement ring off her finger. "And I don't want to be with someone who is stupid and don't respect what I am. Because if you don't respect Spike and what he is now, then you don't respect me."

She put the ring on the counter and walked over to the door. On the way she stopped. She took Buffy's hand in hers and said, "I'm really happy for you," before leaving the shop.

Buffy stood there in shock, as did Xander. He walked over to the counter slowly and picked up the ring. Sadly, he put it in his pocket.

"I'm sorry," he said walking over to Buffy. "I am happy for you. You do deserve it, and if Spike here makes you happy, then I'm… okay with it."

"Thanks Xander," Buffy said, hugging him.

When Xander had left the shop in search of Anya, the remaining people sat and stood quiet.

"Congratulations," Tara said finally, looking at Buffy and Spike.

"Thanks," Buffy said to the Wicca. She walked back over to the table, no longer feeling the need to stand.

"So… Do you know what you're having? I mean, not like if it's a demon or human, I mean, a boy or a girl?" Willow rambled nervously.

"No, we don't, I think I want it as a surprise," Buffy said. Silence fell again.

"So, um, are you gonna start working or s-something?" Tara asked and looked at Spike. He looked startled at the question; he was not expecting them to ask him anything. Besides, this did not even have to do with the baby.

The baby. His baby. God, that was a bloody great thought.

"I don't know. I've looked into it a little, but since I don't really have a social security number or a birth certificate, it is a little hard."

"I, um, believe that would be fixable," Giles said, opening his mouth for the first time since Buffy had announced her pregnancy.

"How?" Buffy inquired.

"The Council. I'm quite sure they would be able to help you. They have connections. I'll talk to them."

"That would be great, Giles!" Buffy exclaimed happily.

"Now, about this baby," Giles said. "Are you sure it is all fine?"

Buffy nodded. "Yeah. The doctor said so, and that's the closest to a guarantee I can come."

"Well then," Giles said as he began polishing his glasses. "I guess all I can do is congratulate the two of you."

Buffy threw herself around her watcher, hugging him happily to the point where Giles had to gasp, "Buffy, I need to breathe."

"Oh sorry. But I'm just so happy. I was so afraid you would be angry with me…"

"She was scared to the point where she was refusing to go inside," Dawn told the group with a giggle. "We stood outside for like ten minutes trying to convince her to go inside."

"Hormones, you know," Spike added in a secretive whisper to the others. Buffy slapped his chest softly.

"Be nice, honey," she said, glaring at him. Her eyes betrayed her though; they glowered lovingly at him.

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